Hey, before diving in, respect yourself for all that you have had to deal with. Be grateful to your body for the support and movement it grants you. Affirm your mind to help you navigate this world which can be a little unkind sometimes. And most importantly, thank your heart, for just letting you be!
Breathe in, and breathe out. You’ve got this! We and the world believe in you. It's time you do, too!
Life can be really over-exerting sometimes. You may have a deadline approaching and are running out of time to put your thoughts together. You are going through a turbulent phase in a very important relationship in your life. Your mental health is through the roof. You are perhaps also not "feeling it" lately. And maybe, all of this is happening together, and you are feeling alone while just trying to swim to the other end.
You could use a breather, but the question is - how do you find it? And where?
Stick till the end to learn about the repercussions of what stress inflicts on you, why that happens, and how you can deal with it in the most effective ways! Trust us, you'll definitely find what you're looking for. :)
You're really not YOU when you're stressed!
Artwork Credits: Tommy Parker
Stress affects you in more ways than you understand. It is conventionally believed that stress only affects your mental or emotional health.
But, there are numerous tell-tale signs that suggest your body is also having a hard time coping with... well, life!
Stress can cause:
- Appetite changes & digestive issues
- Urge to make more unhealthy lifestyle choices
- Mental health breakdowns
- Anxiety disorders
- Sleep issues (insomnia, sleep apnea, and the like)
- Immense fatigue and irritability
- Burnouts
It can even orchestrate many chronic, serious problems. Moreover, even on a psychological level, stress can decrease your IQ by as much as 13%!
Why does this happen?
When dealing with situations of stress or anything uncomfortable, our body and mind generate multiple responses - with or without being consciously aware of them.
They can usually be grouped into four different categories: fight, flight, freeze or fawn.
- Fight responses come when your body and/or mind feel the need to encounter or deal with the problem.
- Flight responses come when your mind and/or body want to flee or evade the situation, for the time being, buying time. This is a way to cope by just letting the situation be the way it is (and its consequences).
- - Freeze responses occur when your body and/or mind become ineffective in or unable to deal with the problem. You can't fight it; you can't evade it. In other words, you don't decide on anything.
- Fawn responses are a way to tackle the situation by pleasing others - usually at your own cost - in order to deal with them. This can enter the grounds of self-sabotaging!
Depending on what kind of personality you have or the kind of childhood you've borne, stress can trigger any (or even a combination) of the aforementioned types of responses.
Fret not; you can navigate through them in a plethora of ways!
Where do you begin to destress?
There are many, many ways to destress. And most come with hints of self-awareness!
Taking time to understand what makes you feel what emotions or what triggers what kind of responses in you can help you build an effective strategy in order to cope with not just stress, but any mishappening in your life. This is not to say you would be able to take control of your emotions or feelings, but exactly the opposite of it! You would be able to understand what you can and cannot control in life, and the acceptance of both will help you in overcoming what lies ahead - both good and bad.
How do you build a destressing routine?
- Spend time with yourself. You learn a lot about yourself when you are alone. You also get to know if you are even comfortable being alone.
- Note what makes you happy. If you don't know yet, try things out. Go out for a coffee with yourself (or even with someone you like spending time with), play games, listen to music, read, watch movies etc. Do anything that you think of doing when you're tired of work.
- Note what DOES NOT make you happy. Cancelled plans at the last minute, being gaslighted by someone, no work-life balance, not being able to find time for yourself, working too hard, working too less - everything. Note it down. And then come back to it later when you feel a little better - you would be able to form a better sense of your personhood!
- - Make gratitude + shortcomings lists. No, really! Gratitude lists will keep you grounded and happy, while shortcoming lists will keep you informed of where you lack, and what you feel you need to work on. The point is to be objective about your negatives!
- Have someone to listen to you. It can be difficult to reach out to someone when you are not in the mood to talk to anyone, or you may feel embarrassed to talk about what you're feeling in the first place. In such cases, use this:
"Hey, I have been feeling a little low lately and haven't really opened up to anyone about it. But I was just wondering if I could talk to you because I feel safe/comfortable with you!"
Everyone feels vulnerable from time to time. It does not make you weak or small! :)
If this continues to be an issue, seek a therapist or a professional to help you out! - You cannot control everything. You have to be okay with the fact that there is very, very little in the world that you can control. This is an insignificant fraction. So, just accepting this fact will help you in being rational about a lot of things in life.
- Meditate. Yes, yes, everyone suggests it, & it sounds sooooo boring. But only until you try it. Meditation is one of the most calming practices you can ever undertake. You don't have to go hard on this - just practising a few breathing exercises can help you get rid of all the negativity, stress, and helplessness. Give guided meditative content a shot here! They are super relaxing & put you at ease instantly.
- You can even tune in some meditative music to feel more at peace! Find them here!
Perhaps the best thing about self-care and self-love is that they are all about YOU - what works for you, what does not work for you, what you like, what you don't!
Curious to know more?
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